Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Strange round of events.

Like Ashley said, we got another negative. She asked me to buy more pregnancy tests to try to test again, but I think were both pretty resigned to the fact that our day 12 test was probably right.

The morning that she tested, I was half awake, half dreaming when I felt her rolling around in bed. I asked her if she tested and she whispered it was positive. Of course, this was ultimately a dream, but how weird to roll over shortly thereafter, asking if she tested and expecting to hear the same thing she said earlier hearing instead that she got a negative test. It was confusing and a bummer, but for whatever reason I have not had the same deep negative feelings as I usually do after a negative test.

I feel like it's around the corner. Maybe it's not our month this month, but it's coming. It's gotta be.

Ashley's basically covered everything that's been going on around here lately with the church and apartment talk. We found an awesome apartment that really was too good to be true... but it was true! And then it was rented out from under us. So we're back on the hunt. The same lady who rented the too-good-to-be-true apartment is trying to hook us up with another unit which is much less too-good. It's more expensive, smaller, and doesn't have off street parking--which is no good. The landlord is willing to work with us, but I'm not sure it's worth haggling.

As for the church stuff... I'm pretty anti-church. The things I enjoy about church can be found in other supportive organizations that don't involve God. That being said, I understand that not everyone feels the way that I do. Ashley's dad took us to his church and it was alright. They hardly mentioned God and rather focused on teaching a lesson that happened to come from the Bible. Ok, that I can handle. But I can't handle bands that play Christian rock and church goers who raise their hands and sway while listening. Everyone we met was super nice but I'm afraid I'm not swayed (no pun intended). Regardless, here and there, I'll accompany Ashley when she wants to go. And when our baby comes around, I'm not opposed to... considering... well, we'll see.

For now we're contemplating our next move on the road to baby-making and I have a hard time committing to the idea of any kind of IVF just yet. 3 IUIs with a doctor doesn't seem to me to warrant jumping to IVF. But, like I said, I've got this strange feeling it's just around the corner for us. I hope this isn't just insanity setting in. :)

-Kristen

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