Monday, July 4, 2011


I like this word "inertia" because it is ambiguous.  It means neither to continue moving or to continue sitting still, but merely to continue.  To continue doing whatever it is you may be doing.

Ashley and I are continuing our pursuit of parenthood although we hit a speed bump.

This whole not being pregnant thing... that really surprised me.  I know it sounds dumb to expect that you'll beat the odds, that things will work out in your favor, but I had this deep gut feeling telling me that we were pregnant.  The night before Ashley got her period we went out for wings after I got out of work and I told her I just had this feeling. Well, that feeling was all wrong.

I am disappointed--there is no denying that--but I am ready to push through that disappointment and look forward to next time.  I mean, really, how long can we be upset about not getting pregnant?  Ashley's taking it pretty hard which puts me in this complicated position of wanting to understand her sorrow and wanting to be over it.

There's a lot of time between this attempt and the next which puts a lot of emphasis on both attempts.  If there were some way to avoid the delay, to continue trying rather than skipping a month, I think it would take the focus off of our last attempt.

Until next time,