Monday, November 28, 2011

Finally home

I had a wonderful time with my nephews over the weekend.  They are absolutely adorable and I really love playing with them, cuddling, and teaching them new things.  I am very grateful that I went.  The trip was altogether a success.  No major fighting with my parents until the ride home... I consider that a big accomplishment.  My brother and sister-in-law were a lot of fun to hang out with and I am happy that I was able to spend time with them.  Both of them are growing up and starting to be a little less self-centered which makes spending time with them much more enjoyable. 

On the baby front... I started Clomid yesterday.  I am not sure if it is just power of suggestion or the real thing, but I have been a bit emotional.  I got pulled over on the way home yesterday and got a $110 speeding ticket (in my defense my father was yelling at me for hours before that I was going too slow).  I almost burst into tears after the cop walked away because all I could think about was that the $110 is going to have to come out of the baby making fund.  My dad ended up saying he was going to pay for the ticket because he shouldn't have been telling me to go so fast on a holiday weekend. :) 

Sorry... back to baby making.  I am on day two of Clomid and everything seems ok.  I cried a little bit this morning, but I can't really tell that my emotions are worse than normal.  I have an ultrasound scheduled for next Monday to check my follicles.  Our doctor isn't available that day, so we will meet with someone else after the ultrasound, but I am pretty sure that our doctor is going to be the one doing the IUI.  I really like her, so hopefully that is the case.

The crying jag this morning was a little annoying.  I am just really worried about money.  I know it would never happen, but I worry that at the end of this Kristen is going to be mad at me for our spending for something that I wanted.  I know that we both want to have a baby and that we are in this together financially, I just worry that she may resent me if it doesn't work.  I know this is a very silly worry (especially knowing Kristen), but I am a little gun shy.   These feelings come from a past relationship and I just can't shake all of the baggage.

My mom picked out and bought an FAO Schwartz crib set over the weekend.  It was on sale and she thought it would be one that we liked.  Both Kristen and I like it, but it kind of stinks because we both wanted to pick it out together.  I would return it so we could shop together for one, but I don't think we will find one we like better, plus the price was right! 

I suppose that is all from me today. Best of luck to everyone TTC and those that are pregnant too.  Hope you all had a Thanksgiving filled with love, warmth, and full bellies! :)

1 comment:

  1. I cried A LOT when I was on Clomid. I'm a crier normally, so I wasn't sure if the tears were Clomid induced or not... but I was watching 16 and Pregnant (Tyler and Katelynn's story) and BAWLLLLED uncontrollably when they were deciding to give their baby up for adoption. It was a bit ridiculous... and really, I blame the Clomid (and all other hormones in my body because of this crazy process). You just have to tell yourself that at the end of all this, it will be worth it. :)

    On another, more serious note... finances are a BIIIG part of this. I was always so worried that Jennifer would start to resent how much money we were spending on this but we both have to remind ourselves that this is a goal of both of ours. And that because this process is our only chance for us to have a baby, we have to have trust in this process and that it works. Everyone told us this, and we didn't really believe them (until now) that all the money we have spent to finally get the positive will be all worth it. So, hang in there and just budget as much as possible. It's really been our saving grace that Jennifer and I are both pretty level headed with our budget and finances. :)

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