What a crazy summer it has been. My parents’ separation has been weird, stressful, and altogether tiresome. My mother’s business (that I work for three days a week) has had a lot of problems recently. And to top it all off my body has been attacking itself… I have psoriasis, so autoimmune issues are not entirely new to me, but in early July my dentist diagnosed a small spot in my mouth as erosive lichen planus. I know that stress is a key contributor to autoimmune issues, but it is really hard not to be stressed with everything that is going on. Luckily, the treatment seems to be working very well and the spot in my mouth is clearing up quickly.
So, after taking one month off from trying to conceive, we are back in the game. I am a little nervous about it because of everything that has been going on. We also had to go through the process of picking a new donor this time around. Our first choice is sold out until October. Our second choice had three vials available but we just bought one. Hopefully this time works so we don’t have to pick someone else next month.
This month, there is a very different tone going into trying to make a baby. I am less sure that it is going to happen and I am less committed to a time frame. I had this idea that I would take one semester off from school (spring), have the baby in March, and then go back to school in September and everything would be perfect. Life just doesn’t work like that and I should have known better. Today, I am trying to be very conscious about thinking positive but being realistic. I think I need to start meditating or something.
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